Reader,

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Lately I’ve been thinking of the idea of creating safe spaces especially for people who hold systemically marginalized identities. That was my aim as a facilitator… “creating a brave and safe space for all participants”, but that is impossible! Yes, impossible, I bet you knew that already.

I wish I could, but I cannot ensure your safety if we’re in a shared/communal space, so why should I offer that? I’m not trying to be pessimistic or jaded when I say this. But I know that sooner or later, someone, even with the best of intentions, could cause harm. And I do want to be prepared for that.

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How do you prepare for and recover from harm in communal spaces?

By setting a container for your meetings.

By offering repair.

If you have provided relationship counseling, or are trained in systems, you know how it goes. Even in the most loving of relationships there is the potential of causing unintended harm. And here is where we learn to offer repair.

But I know life is more complex than relationship counseling. And offering repair in communal spaces means:

• I need to be ready to hold space for all people involved.
• I need to have in mind the identities of the individual who caused rupture and the identities of the individual who was harmed.

In other words, if you caused rupture and offer repair, don’t expect your offer to be accepted. And if you were harmed by rupture, I’ll do my best to hold space for you and your needs.

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Want to add more complexity to this puzzle?

Have in mind your identities, were your privileged identities harmed, or were your marginalized identities harmed? or both??

What's your reaction when one of your privileged identities is harmed vs. one of your marginalized identities?

How do you set a boundary if you're not ready for repair?

How do you create responsive and brave spaces in your community that can offer repair?

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In community,

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Silvana @ Decolonize Your Practice​

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Let's connect!